Hi Leader,

In Your Three-Story House I suggested that in each of the levels you do a different kind of work:

The ground floor is where you work in the business. On the second floor you work on the business. You work in the business to serve your clients. You work on the business to improve the business operation.

The third floor is where you work on you. You are the most important instrument for your business and for your life. Your confidence, versatility and energy enable you to create movement and to produce results. Here are seven realizations about your personal growth - the work you do on the third floor. This work determines your success on the other two floors.

7 Realizations About Your Personal Growth

  1. Reclaim your power. If you are not reclaiming your power, you are not operating from a position of strength and you are letting us all down. You owe yourself and the people that look up to you the full measure of your strength and value.
  2. Appreciate your journey learnings. The setbacks and challenges you have encountered helped you learn and grow. Your response to them has made you a better and more versatile instrument today.
  3. Learn to forgive yourself. It takes courage and humility to learn to forgive yourself as you grow to discover your better, more able self.
  4. Stop making someone else's Kvetch your own. To be free is to recognize you cannot and don't need to take from others their struggle. Everyone has their Kvetch. My definition of Kvetch is "convulted-first-time-in-the-history-of-the-world-unbelieveably-complex-difficult-and-challenging-set-of-circumstances-that-overwhelm-you." You have no business taking another person's Kvetch and making it your own. This is no way to help. First, you cannot take their Kvetch from them. Second, by trying to take their Kvetch, you validate, nourish and magnify it.
  5. Let the future define you. Why would you allow yourself to be defined by what you already accomplished yesterday when even greater, more majestic growth possibilities are opening up on the horizon of tomorrow? Let tomorrow, not yesterday define you.
  6. Grow by embracing new challenges. Personal growth is not about resolving all the contradictions of life, it is about learning to gracefully manage the greater contradiction of living. You know you are growing when you encounter new lessons and different challenges than those you overcame last year.
  7. There are two things you must do. A great Rabbi once said: "We all come to this life to do two kinds of things: what's easiest and what's most difficult for us. The easiest things reveal to you your gifts; they show you what you are meant to be doing. The most difficult things teach you to go beyond your self-limiting beliefs; they help you embrace powers greater than your own."

Now it is your turn. Turn the key. Reclaim your power. Appreciate your journey learnings. Learn to forgive yourself. Stop making someone else's Kvetch your own. Let the future define you. Grow by embracing new challenges. Do what's easiest and do what's most difficult for you.

© Aviv Shahar